#WeNeedToTalk: Why Do We Love to Hate Things?

And why is it so hard for us to truly uplift what we say we value?

Photo by Claudio Schwarz on Unsplash

We all love to hate things. I’ll be the first to admit, I love watching a bad movie or ridiculous TV show - not because it’s good, but because it’s entertaining in just how bad it is. There’s something oddly comforting about laughing at a terribly written script, or obvious continuity issues.

But here’s what I don’t love admitting: when someone recommends a show that’s actually good , the kind with depth, good characters , and diversity then I all of a sudden “don’t have the time.”

It’s the same with viral social media content. We’ll watch hilarious pranks we know are staged or tune into mindless drama because it’s trending, but we will scroll right past videos offering free education, deep insight, or inspiration. We don’t engage with them, we don’t share them, and we definitely don’t uplift them with the same enthusiasm.

We always say we want more meaningful music, more diverse stories, better representation but when that indie musician releases a soulful album or that unknown filmmaker puts out something gorgeous, it rarely gets the same support.

So why do we do this? Why do our actions so often contradict our words? Is it because it requires people to think? I understand needing something mindless at the end of the day to unwind, but maybe the things that could help us unwind are the very things that we are asking for.

We say we’re tired of shallow content, of fake news, of the same five artists dominating the charts. We complain about the lack of representation, of nuance, of substance. And yet… when presented with the real thing we don’t show up for it. Not in the way we do for what’s familiar or safe.

I’m not judging. I get sucked into this pattern too.
But I think it’s worth asking: what would happen if we started loving things just as loudly as we love to hate them?

What if we really supported the artists, educators, and creators who are doing the work we claim to care about?

What if we made time for the good stuff, even when it asks something more of us than just a quick laugh or an eye-roll?

I don’t have all the answers — but I do know this: our attention has power. And we get to decide where we place it.

So maybe next time, instead of defaulting to the easy scroll or the ironic binge, we choose to click play on something that feeds us, that challenges us, or that simply reflects the world we say we want to see.

Because loving things — really loving them — takes intention.
And maybe that’s what we’re missing.

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